Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
