I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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