We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
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