how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize