Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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