it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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