My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
did i just pee glitter
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
