He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize