Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
