Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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