between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
