I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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