I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
