some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
