one might say we're banned from that church
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
