Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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