i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
