Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Your cock deserves a montage
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
