Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Im part way to drunk.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
