Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Randomize
