I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
