My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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