can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
