I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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