I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
