He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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