i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
