i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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