It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
