billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
