remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
