idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
