I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Randomize
