Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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