I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize