I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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