I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
