what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
