Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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