This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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