I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
