It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
