I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
