i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
