god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
