Its about making memories worth repressing
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize