think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
