you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize