I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
