conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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