You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
and she was petting her beer can
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
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